A BUMP IN THE ROAD

I wish to extend my sincere apologies to my readers for my recent and prolonged absence from these pages.  I freely admit that I have been overwhelmed with angst these many weeks.  It has been a bedfellow for quite some time.  It strikes without warning and envelopes me.  It reminds one of the unwelcome relative who overstays their visit.  Sometimes it’s only an inning, other times it goes into extra innings.  Captive to it I become and only through God’s loving hand am I set free. 

Set free I am, thankfully once again.  Earlier this evening, I happened to answer my phone.  It was a friend, a good friend who I have not spoken to or seen in over a year.  Her voice was that of an angel.  Hearing her voice, laugher and words caressed my very soul.  It started a movement of music within me.  The chains and shackles that clung to me were breaking free. 

Energized by her words and caring soul, I knew what my next step would have to be.  It was time to free myself.  Feeling alive again, I ventured out to walk silently into the night enjoying the pace of my footsteps beating on the pavement.  It was going to be one mile, then two miles and yet a third mile exorcising the demons that have walked with me these past few months.  How free I felt.  How alive I felt. 

Collapsing upon recovery, I fell into slumber and slept the dreams of champions.  A three-hour nap mid-evening is generally a recipe of disaster for my night’s four to five hours of sleep.  Upon awakening, I reached for that dreadful phone that always carries messages whenever I am absent from it.  There was only one and the number was not one I recognized.  Good, I thought, no messages from work.  That’s a first. 

God in his infinite wisdom and mercy knew that it would take a second call to fully and completely arouse me from my blues.  Sure enough, it was yet again a dear friend; a friend not spoken to in years.  The occasional email back and forth but this friend goes back to those very early years when we played cowboys and Indians, soldiers and spies.  His was a voice from my earliest years as a child where we grew up only a few houses apart on the same street. 

The messages were clear even if unspoken.  Both called out of love and concern.  How lucky I am to have two such friends.  How selfish am I to allow myself to be devoured by such an unruly bedfellow.  I thank God tonight, early morning for his love for me and for my friends.  It is truly a blessing to have someone like Kay, my best friend’s best friend to call me and awaken me from my hour of despair.  The incredible joy realized when your longest good friend reaches out to you and provides affirmation of your life. 

I have been absent way too long.  I have lots of stories to share.  My frustrations, my joys and my expectations are overflowing now and will soon spill out onto the many pages I write.   You may not agree with all of what I write and that’s okay.  I wouldn’t have it any other way.  Thank God from whom all blessings flow.